Branson, Mo. Wow. More about that later…
Last week, we loaded up the Yukon (if only it were an old VW bus) and headed off to the Nexstar Nationals dance competition in Branson. Elizabeth’s dance troupe has been working on two numbers for the past ten months, and these final performances were their best yet. I am proud of my girl.
There were several moments at the competition that made Little Miss Sunshine ring so true… including, but not limited to:
- a group of six-year-olds performing, and I kid you not, “The Booty Dance”
- at least two groups of eight-year-olds who took off clothes a la Demi Moore during their performance
- and stage moms who…. I have to stop now
Now on to the topic of Branson. The natural beauty all around Branson is gorgeous. So gorgeous, that you may find yourself thinking,”I’ll sell it all, buy a cabin and some overalls and hawk maple syrup for the rest of my life just to live in these hills on this lake.” But then you drive into the city of Branson, and all of your instincts scream “FLEE! FLEE AS FAST AS YOU CAN!”
It’s as if someone took a giant BeDazzler to the entire town. Bedazzled in a Andy Williams meets Shoji Tabuchi meets the Titanic kind of way. And I’m not getting anywhere near The Baldknobbers. The mall even has a pyrotechnics show.I am out of words now.